Today when talking to my dad I realized that all of the things I told my now ex-boyfriend I never have told any one ever. Not my best friends not any of my other ex-boyfriends. I think thats one of my problems about our break up, I've tx him many things I've never told any one before.
Secrets that I've kept locked up for years, things that i think that if tx I'd die of embarrassment. No theyre nothing bad they're just Personal things I've never told anyone before. And no Ik not going to tell them in my blog,....... anytime soon that is. I love him that much j guess. I've told bok things that I've never been able to get off my chest since my mum died. These things made my skeptical and shy they also made me cry. There are many emotions I never knew I could feel when j was with him. There was sorrow when SOMEHOW we got onto a really sad subject or flustered when we talked about nothing but I wanted to talk but just didn't know where to start.
There was frustration when he made me think about the confusing stuff he decided to say.
I'm not going to lie there are and were times when I felt completely stupid when talking to him. But to also be very honest it just meant I had a very smart boyfriend..... for once. Haha. Any way. I can't say I always felt ok about that. I mean I'm a girl the girl HAS to be right/smart sometimes ,>_<
But again I domt care it really did mean he was smart erm IS smart. I love a man who's not only handsome but smart and knows what he wants when he finishes high school. It so meant. Sense of secure and that meant I'd last with him.... well in this case I thought.
Well then again we could have a chance to be together it just depends.
One things for sure I always thought of seeing myself married to him. I do love him bunch. And I will wait to be with him of I have to and if thats what I have to do to be with him again.
Anyway that's all for now.
**star**
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